Mary Ann Hayes

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve said, “Oh, how I would love to be a fly on the wall.”  Or, “wouldn’t it be great to be a fly on the wall for that conversation!”  And then there’s, “Oh-My-Gosh! I need to be a fly on the wall!”

Fly’s are filthy. They carry a variety of diseases and spread them everywhere. They lay eggs on our fruit, our pets, on rotting flesh, on just about anything. They don’t give a thought to the neighborhood; they’ll let those eggs hatch anywhere.

And then they proceed to eat disgusting things – like manure. You know what it’s like to come upon a pile of horse poop on a nice sunny summer day? Oh, yes. The flies!

Yet, the disgusting little critters are nothing more than disease infested wimps. They have little endurance and only live about 28 days. That’s it. They have 28 days to do their worst.

So, where did that crazy saying come from? Why would we say such a stupid thing — that we would like to be a fly on the wall?

Well, for starters, flies can see behind them; which brings to mind the old saying, “If only I had eyes in the back of my head.” Well, the eyes of flies are so large they see front, sides, and behind them — any old time they want, even all at the same time. And lastly, (and least,) flies are incredibly agile and quick as a blink. Even with huge, over-sized eyes.

So, I have to admit, I actually would like to be a fly on the wall, just one time, regardless of how disgusting I would be. I would enjoy being quick and dodgy and stand upside down on the ceiling. And, I’d love to have eyes in the back of my head, so to speak, for a day. Just imagine not missing a thing!

But most of all, I would love to zip through the door at the very last second to listen in on one of those closed-door executive meetings where the truth is muttered then buried in paperwork full of fake facts, and mistakes are admitted in hushed nervous voices so no-one on the outside will hear.

That is when I’d love to be a fly on the wall.

Later,

Mary Ann